Barchester learned earlier today that Prime Minister Gordon Brown announced, ‘If there are any questions asked over the bonuses, I will examine them’. Over £47 million were paid in bonuses to the Ministry of Defence but not to soldiers, to the civil servants. No doubt the civil servants deserve compensation for their service and the risk upon their lives. But what about the soldiers themselves? Last time Barchester looked into the matter, our men and women hardly had quality shoes or weapons. But probably the most shocking evidence of government mismanagement (or incompetence, ignorance, et al), are the numbers. The Telegraph reports that,
A total of 232 British service personnel have been killed in Afghanistan since 2001. More than 1,000 have been seriously wounded.
A total of 50,000 civil servants have been given bonuses this year
Astounding. With the current Labour spending practices it is no wonder that a figure like this could escape the examining eye of our beloved leader. But, we are assured, if (if) there are questions, Gordy will examine them. Thanks be to God. Meanwhile, ‘Commanders have said that some deaths could have been avoided if there had been more helicopters available.’
But while Gordy is spending his valuable time examining people’s questions (presumably to figure out what the question really means), there is much work to do to communicate back to the plebs. Enter Lord Mandelson. Labour in all its vast wisdom is creating the ultimate solution to this problem. Besides the fact that funding for the newly created position of Minister of Information is of questionable origin, Labour is finally recognising what has always been the case: that Mandy is quite the spin doctor. Of course, the Guardian (of what it guards exactly is up for debate) reports that, ‘Such a role would not involve Mandelson giving up his post as business secretary’. Naturally. It’s just giving official status to what was already the case but now that Gordy will be spending most of his remaining time in Downing Street examining people’s questions, he needs his old (sometime) friend to give ‘answers’ and explain the unexplainable to both the English and Chav alike. Oh joy.
